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What Are The Signs?

Symptoms of Danger

It is hard to admit that you may be a victim of domestic violence. The following are some of the classic symptoms of an abused domestic violence victim:

  • Low self-esteem.
  • Often exposed to abuse as a child.
  • Isolation from friends and family.
  • Feelings of helplessness.
  • Constantly feeling like you're walking on eggshells.
  • Feeling there's no help out there; you're alone.
  • Depression.
  • Thinking that the abuse is your fault.
  • Feelings of guilt.
  • Feeling stressed out.
  • Thinking every time you're beaten that it's the last time.
  • Denial that anything is wrong to family and friends.
  • Lying about how your injuries were caused.
  • Believing that being pushed or shoved isn't domestic violence.

Take this quiz to assess your relationship

Has your partner ever...

  • Destroyed your property (photos, mementos, furniture)?
  • Used or threatened use of a weapon?
  • Called you stupid, crazy, worthless, etc.?
  • Accused you of infidelity?
  • Hurt, or threatened to hurt or kill your pets?
  • Threatened to have your children "taken away" or removed from the home?
  • Kidnapped or threatened to kidnap your children?
  • Been violent with your children or used methods of discipline you felt were unreasonable or excessive?
  • Made negative comments about your friends or relatives?
  • Prevented you from seeing or talking to friends or relatives?
  • Acted violently towards anyone who has tried to stop your partner or intervene?
  • Threatened to kill you or to kill you if you leave?
  • Described how you would be killed in detail?
  • Threatened suicide
  • Told you that violence is your fault or is caused by your actions?
  • Denied you of sleep or food?
  • Acted violently toward you when you were pregnant, especially hitting, punching or kicking your stomach?
  • Forced you to perform any sexual act against your will?
  • Prevented you from seeking medical attention for injuries caused by your partner?
  • Been extremely remorseful after a violent incident promising you it will never happen again?
  • Kept track of your movements?

If you answered yes to two or more of these questions, you may be in danger of becoming, or have already become, a victim of domestic violence. You may want to believe that your partner really isn't to blame and that your problems will go away on their own, but this isn't true. Batterers need long-term professional help from a licensed health care professional to stop the cycle of violence.

Common Characteristics
Among Many Batterers

  • Low self-esteem.
  • May have been exposed to abuse or abused as a child.
  • Blame others for their actions; especially their partner.
  • May be very jealous and possessive.
  • Appear to have dual personalities.
  • Use alcohol or drugs as an excuse.
  • Promise not to hurt you again.
  • Have an explosive temper.
  • May be very charming and controlling.
  • Use sex as an act of aggression to enhance their self-esteem.
  • Accept no blame for their actions.

Additional Recources:

Domestic Violence Education Powerpoint

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